Sacrifice
by SuperLeaf
Summary: When things go downhill and leads Jason to make the ultimate decision: to do or don't. He's stuck balancing on a knife's edge, his life on one side and the lives of his friends on the other. And Percy has to come to terms with the unthinkable situation. "I'm Roman, Percy. And Romans know how to sacrifice."
1. Chapter 1

**I'm so sorry...**

* * *

" _Jason!_ Jason, no! _Don't do this!_ " Percy pleaded, reaching out to his friend. It was storming heavily, electricity flashing across the sky dangerously, outlining Jason's figure perfectly as the son of Jupiter. The boy himself was hovering just out of reach of his frantic friend, an apologetic, sad smile on his face. He wiped blood out of his eyes and touched his matted, blonde hair- or what was left of it. Lightning did not affect him but fire did.

Percy was leaning as far as he could off of the balcony, his left arm mangled and most likely with some irreparable damage, but that was last thing on his mind. His right arm, covered in burns as well, was stretched towards the floating demigod. Thunder echoed through the air. "Jason!" He begged, nearly sobbing. The tears mixed with the rain cascading from the sky.

"I'm sorry, Percy." Jason's voice was soft, but Percy heard every word clear as day. Jason's left eye stared into Percy's eyes, his right covered by an eyepatch that was falling loose and showing the ugly gash. "You know it has to be me."

"It doesn't have to be either of us! We can think a way out of this, we always have!" Percy tried to catch even the foot of the demigod but Jason was too far away. "We always have!"

"Percy." Jason shook his head, eye closed. "There's nobody left to fight. But they're all still alive; I want to keep it that way. And you know, out of the two of us, they like you more." There was pain in his voice but also complete acceptance. Defeated acceptance.

"Jason-"

"Don't try, Percy. I can try to be everything everyone expects but I will never be good enough. Always second best. That's okay, I'm fine. But that doesn't mean I'm going to stand back and watch this happen." Jason stared off to his left, the sky flashing and reflecting the storm in his eye.

"But this doesn't mean you have to die, Jason! There's always another way! Greek policy, always hope!" Percy was grasping at straws at this point. He couldn't feel his fingertips and his hair was dripping in his face. Or was that rain? Tears? Blood? Sweat?

A laugh of the defeated escaped Jason's figure and an ache burned in Percy. He had never seen his friend so crushed and finished.

"That's the thing, Percy, that you just don't seem to understand. I'm not Greek. And that's the problem, isn't it? That I'm willing to sacrifice for the greater good? That I don't run after every friend? That I know that we aren't going to walk out in tact from every situation?" Tears fell freely from the son of Jupiter's face. Bloody tears from his right eye and clear from his left. "I'm _Roman,_ Percy. And Romans know how to sacrifice."

Percy's heart stopped. He was frozen, gazing up at his broken friend. Nothing else mattered.

Jason was stoic; he was unmoving, seemingly unfeeling at times. Almost harsh. Wolf-like.

Roman.

"Don't…" Percy tried weakly. Jason's face broke, pain showing through. He rushed forward and wrapped Percy in a hug, the black-haired demigod frozen in place. Before Percy had the chance to wrap his arms around his friend Jason was already leaving. "No!" Percy's voice broke and he scrambled after Jason who was just out of his reach, again. "Please!"

"Take care of them for me," Jason whispered, his parting words. Then he flew backwards and trained his eye on the contraption that had started this whole mess. His gaze hardened into unfaltering determination, his body taking a spartan-like stance. There was one shot at this.

Percy watched as Jason let loose a guttural cry and shoot towards the contraption, disappearing into it in a display of blazing lighting and flashing metal from his sword.

"Jason! JASON!" Percy screamed at the top of his lungs as the sky shuddered, the earth following soon after. The contraption exploded in a brilliant show of flame and electricity, a small, sparking figure falling from the wreckage. "NO!" Percy shrieked, turning on his heel and sprinting down the stairs of the building he was in. Upon reaching the shaking ground-no doubt his doing-he sprinted to where he saw the figure drop, metal and materials falling around him. A pipe crashed into his shoulder, but he shook it off, eyes only for a shock of blonde among the dull iron.

He found what he was looking for, but there was no blonde to catch sight of. Jason's body was covered in black soot, red mixing with the black and almost overcoming it. A strangled sound escaped Percy's throat and he hoped against hope that Jason was somehow still alive.

The son of the sea god scrambled to find his pulse, his breath, the stuttering beat of a heart. Silence and cold skin met his efforts. Percy sobbed, falling over his fallen friend in despair. Percy's salty tears mixed with the soot and blood on the roman's torso.

The thunder grew louder and the rain heavier, and the sky wept for its lost child.

-x-

They thought that Percy would try to keep their spirits up somehow, like he always did in times of trouble. They thought, well, at least it's not like when Percy and Annabeth fell into Tartarus, when there was no glue.

Percy was done being the glue. He didn't want to be needed. Jason's words echoed in his brain endlessly: " _Always second best."_

Second best? Percy scoffed at the thought. Jason deserved to be equal to him, more than equal. He _sacrificed_ his _life_ for them. There was no doubt in Jason's mind when he knew he was flying to his death, but he did it anyway. One of his reasons being that everyone would be able to manage without him, but not without Percy, the only other demigod powerful enough to defeat their enemy at the time.

"Percy, you have to eat." Chiron pushed a plate of pizza towards the boy, who stared at the food with empty eyes. There was a blue coke beside the plate but he barely even noticed it. "I have some ambrosia for you." Chiron prodded. Percy remained unresponsive. Chiron sighed; another failed attempt under the belt.

Percy was still lost in his thoughts. Jason thought he was unneeded, perhaps. Maybe he thought that they were better off without him. Did he believe that the loss of Percy would have a deeper effect on the group as a whole?

In Annabeth, certainly, she would have been devastated. But the more Percy thought about it, the more he realized how important Jason was to their group. He had a deeper connection with the members than Percy ever did.

Hazel and Frank had known Jason before the switch, being in the same cohort as him. They were friends before Hazel and Frank knew Percy existed, and though they still loved Percy, he knew Jason's loss devastated them in ways his passing never would.

Why was he thinking about this? Percy had no idea. Somewhere his mind echoed how toxic this line of thought was. He didn't care.

Piper didn't do much other than cry, eat, and throw knives. She was also more aggressive and used Annabeth as a shoulder to cry on when being angry got exhausting. She had taken to sleeping in Cabin One, and upon not being struck down by Zeus himself the others came to the conclusion that Zeus was being more lenient than usual. Her siblings tried to help but Piper longed for a semblance of normalcy, seeking out friends of Selina to help her forget. In her searches she found Clarisse, who, softened towards Piper from Jason's death, ended up being a considerate friend.

Leo was unseen, disappearing to corners to stare at old pictures that were becoming slowly covered in salty tears, Jason's face in that labrador-grin he was famous for. There was some silly photos, the child of Jupiter seemingly flawless in all of them, unthinkably photogenic. Leo used to tease him all the time about it; now he never would again. Leo cried for his best friend, the one that always knew what to say and when, awkward at the best of times and so very protective.

Hazel and Frank were never seen without each other, taking long walks on the beach and spending time in trees, staring at the sky. The two were the least tear-filled of the seven, having each other for support. Hazel and Frank were Roman as well; they understood sacrifice all too well, and knew their friend would be waiting for them in Elysium.

Annabeth was depressed that Jason was gone but was also immensely worried about Percy. Ever since the harsh battle was over and everyone had convened at Camp Half-Blood, he hadn't shed a single tear.

The battle had ended and the demigods had recuperated at the camp, keeping a watchful eye for Percy and Jason as search parties were sent out for the missing demigods. They had initially been delighted to see Percy's figure appear over the hill, but it became quickly apparent that something was wrong. For one, he was walking as if it were a curse, each step heavy-set and tired. For two, he was carrying a mangled figure in his arms when he shouldn't be carrying anything with the wounds he had.

Demigods rushed to help him and flinched at his hardened eyes. They were tired but cold, and Percy had surveyed the circle of concern.

"Percy?" Annabeth had asked almost tentatively. The last time she had seen him like this was in Tartarus.

The son of the sea god had turned his gaze to Annabeth. She saw the immense pain swimming in them and almost took a step back.

"What is…" she gestured to the unidentifiable figure in his arms. Percy stared down at it as if it were the only thing anchoring him to this world. He sat down and laid the body on the grass of the hill. The demigods around him exchanged nervous glances: they had never seen Percy like this before. The rest of the prophesied seven had showed up.

Without a word, Percy shuffled with something in his pocket before placing a scrap of purple fabric with the letters " _SPQR_ " emblazoned on them onto the body. He said one word, the only word to come out of his mouth since he had arrived at the camp.

"Jason."

A wail had started up.

Jason had left behind more heartbreak than he had thought he would. Of that Percy was certain.

"What's even going on?" the voice was snarky and chilled.

"One of the seven was killed… everyone's in mourning."

"When?"

"A month ago, or so…" the second voice trailed off, hidden grief cloaked in her tone.

"Oh. They're still mourning? Is _he_ mourning too?" the first voice had not lost its disdainful edge.

Two girls stopped in front of Percy, a deer-in-headlights expression on one's face. Percy stared up at them with dead eyes, slouched on a bench. He twitched at their words.

"That's Percy Jackson. He was really close to Jason, remember?" the second, more consolidating girl murmured. She respectfully kept her eyes to the ground and nodded in his direction.

"Well… Jason sounds kinda like a drag anyway," the first girl sniffed.

Percy jerked. The other girl paled considerably. "Oh gods. Uh, please don't listen to her, she's new-"

"Ugh, shut up. I know what I'm saying and I- uh," she broke off stammering. Percy had drawn himself up to his full height and was towering over her, years of pent up pain and hardships showing in his eyes. He leveled his steely glare on them and they squeaked, running off.

Percy sighed deeply, slouching onto the bench again. Annabeth, having seen the whole interaction, approached him.

"Percy, please say something. You have to let out your emotions, it's healthy," she prodded, sitting down gently beside him. Percy considered this. But it was so easy to just… stop. When someone's death was avoidable, maybe, and your fault, possibly, it was easy to just… stop.

"Percy, we're all hurting. And we still don't know what happened. It's been a month, certainly not enough time but more than a week. Let us help you." Annabeth reached out to Percy's shoulder reassuringly. "You need to come to terms with his death. Jason Grace is dead."

The words jarred him more than it should have and he felt his eyes fill with tears. "No," he choked out. Annabeth noted his first words in a month with slightly widened eyes but simply tried to console the broken boy. "No, he can't be."

"I'm sorry, Percy," she said softly, rubbing his back in slow circles.

And Percy sobbed, for the first time since his friend's death. Because he couldn't deny it any longer. There was no way for him to stay unfeeling and cold and detached.

Because Jason Grace was dead.

And nothing could ever be the same again.


	2. Chapter 2

**I never intended for there to be a Part II, but I was struck with inspiration when I realized that I had forgotten someone.**

* * *

Thalia stood on the top of Half Blood Hill, staring away from the camp. Her bow was lax at her side, fingers limp. She appeared both stoic and slumped at the same time. Her eyes were unblinking.

 _Hunting with her sisters, grinning at a good shot, laughing when one girl fell in the river._

The sky was covered in clouds, and she allowed herself one moment of relief before she felt disgusted at herself for feeling relieved at a time like this. Somewhere she told herself that Jason would not want her to grieve this thoroughly, to have some semblance of happiness among his passing.

Jason. Thalia had known that most likely, she would outlive him. She had thought that she would kneel at his grave in dozens of years, the same appearance of a teen, memories of a greyed and grinning Jason fresh in her mind.

 _Wiping the sweat off her brow, glowing with energy, walking to her tent where Artemis waited with a message._

Demigods do not live long lives. She had accepted this. And yet… after Gaea, after everything, she had hoped for a reprieve. They deserved that much, after all, hadn't they?

"Thalia." Annabeth was behind her. The daughter of Zeus did not flinch at her sudden appearance. "Chiron told me to let you know he wishes to talk to you."

Thalia nodded infinitesimally and silence enveloped the two.

Annabeth opened her mouth, hesitated, and closed it. She worried her lip and looked at the strawberry fields below. Her fist made its way to her mouth.

 _Smiling at her goddess, moving to a frown when she solemnly tells her to sit, worrying at the grave atmosphere._

"Percy-" she stopped, took a deep breath, and continued. "Percy is hurting. He won't eat, or speak, or move, and I worry for him."

A few beats of nothing, then, "I can last longer than he."

The quiet said what the two girls didn't: Thalia was mourning the same ways as Percy, he will have to eat eventually, and Thalia will be left. She considered this the way of life. Eventually, she would be all that was left of her friends and family. Everyone leaves.

 _Artemis placing her hands on her shoulders, telling her that her baby brother, Jason Grace, was killed in a fight._

A choked sob escaped Annabeth and she quickly tried to cover her mouth with her fist. Heaving breaths escaped her and mumbles followed. Thalia shifted her gaze to Annabeth, taking in her disheveled form and shaking fists.

 _Stilling, denying, pushing Artemis away and stumbling outside the tent and into the woods, staring glassy-eyed into the trees._

"I'm sorry," Annabeth murmured, more tears falling from her eyes. Her fist was pushed against her lips, trying to cover her sobs in vain. "I'm sorry."

Thalia moved to catch Annabeth when she collapsed, setting her gently on the grass and sitting next to her. A finger gently pressing under Annabeth's temple asked the question Thalia did not want to verbalize.

 _Denial filling her, Artemis gently affirming it, vision clouding over._

"I'm trying so hard for Percy. I need him, Jason was my friend too, and I have to be strong for him, I have to act normal and fine and-" a sob broke through her quickening speech. "I can't come to terms with what's going on, Thalia, we're all depressed and nobody knows what to do, it's like Luke all over again, but worse…"

Thalia wrapped her arms around her old friend and rested her cheek on the crown of Annabeth's head. Annabeth cut off and silently cried, fingers trying to rid her face of tears.

"I miss being whole," Annabeth said quietly. Her hands stilled.

 _Falling to the earth, screaming in grief, her voice tearing from her throat-_

"Me too," Thalia replied softly. "Me too."

-x-

Thalia was like a ghost, flitting around Camp Half-Blood, appearing at random times and disappearing at others. Many wondered why she was still there; others respectfully left her be.

After Percy's outburst, he started eating again, slowly recuperating. She stopped by his cabin one cloud-dotted afternoon.

"I loved him," Percy had said. "He was one of my best friends."

"I know," Thalia had responded. She stood in the doorway, both knowing she was welcome in but that she was not entering. "He knew too. I do not think he knew to what extent."

They had locked eyes for a long, understanding minute, and then Thalia left.

The next time Percy saw her, she was floating high above the lake. He slid into the water and pushed himself near to her, as only he could. There was no sound save the moving water and air.

"When did you learn to fly?" Percy asked her. She just floated, looking down at him. A few beats passed and Percy changed his question. "I thought you were afraid of heights."

"I am," Thalia said. He noticed then that her arms were quivering and her body twitching. The muscles in her arms strained.

"Jason could fly really well," Percy called up to her. He didn't know why he said that. He knew that it was probably one of the worst things to say to her, especially at this time.

"He could. Much better than I." She dipped for a moment before stabilizing, a quick breath pushing passed her lips. They floated in their respective element in silence.

"We would practice sometimes," Percy blurted. When she didn't glare at him or electrocute him (though with the strain she was putting herself through, he doubted it would do anything more than sting). "He would do a trick and if he lost control, I would catch him. The waves sometimes got there first, though."

Percy got quiet as memories flashed through his mind's eye. Jason used to do some wild flips but whenever the wind got away from him, Percy would shoot up and half tackled half catch him, and the two would tumble into the water, laughing breathlessly.

"You have lots of memories of him," Thalia said quietly. There was some regret in her voice. She blinked a few times, feeling liquid start to gather behind her eyelids.

"You do too," Percy said instantly. "He talked about you all the time."

Her lips pressed together and she said nothing else.

"If you fall…" Percy started hesitantly. "I'll catch you."

Thalia felt her chest clench and she glanced down at him, eyes glistening ever so slightly. Not trusting her voice, as she rarely did these days, she nodded. Percy accepted this and lay on his back, floating on the waves. He stared upwards, not specifically at her, but where he would see her if she lost control. Neither one said anything else, and the day stretched on. It was not the last time Percy caught her floating above the waves.

-x-

Piper spun the sword in her palm. "Is that all you got?"

The camper sneered and came after her. She parried easily and slid under them, tripping up their feet. She pressed her foot into their chest and pointed the sword at their throat. They blinked at the sharp point.

She removed her foot and stalked off, ignoring the indignant sputtering of the camper.

"You're getting better," a voice said. She spun, tensed, but relaxed when she realized who they were. Piper unwrapped her hands slowly, moving her fingers to release the tension built up in them.

"I'd hope so."

"Well, with all the practicing you're doing, you'll get better than Jackson."

Piper scoffed. "That's not why I'm doing it."

"Of course not," Clarisse said, rolling her eyes. "If that was your reasoning, we'd be having a talk."

A ghost of a smile passed by Piper's lips, barely noticeable. She sighed, leaning against a wooden table. Her hand ran through her hair, which was put up in a braid.

"I hate sword fighting," she muttered.

"Why do it, then?" Clarisse asked. She leaned up against a post, arms crossed.

Piper clenched her teeth. She wanted to say, but the words would not pass by her lips.

"Jason did." Both women jerked their heads towards the entrance at the sound of a new voice. Thalia entered slowly and purposefully. "He often fought with the sword."

Clarisse glanced at Piper for confirmation and pressed her lips together in understanding.

Piper stared at the daughter of Zeus passively. "Why are you here?"

"Advice and a gift." Thalia approached her, one hand on her hip. "Stop pushing people away."

Piper suppressed a sneer and glared off to the side. "Like you did? Are doing?"

"Am I?" Thalia said. It wasn't a question. "I came here."

Piper had nothing to say to that. She fiddled with her knife. Tense silence filled the tent. Eventually, she closed her eyes. "Why are you here?" this time, her voice cracked in the middle of the sentence. She cleared her throat.

Thalia walked over to Piper and clasped the demigod's hands. She gently unclenched them and placed something metallic and cold into them. Piper opened her eyes and felt all breath leave her body. The gold of the coin glinted in the light. Her eyes met Thalia's in frantic, hurt question.

"He would have wanted you to have this." Thalia searched her eyes, then took a step back. She nodded her head in a sort of bow at Piper, swiveled on her heel, and disappeared.

Piper felt her throat closing and she swallowed thickly, moving the gold coin around in her fingers. She stepped back a few feet and flipped the coin. It landed in her palm and transformed into a long, gold-tipped spear. The familiarity of Jason's weapon caused her tears to start dripping down her face.

Clarisse watched this all happen silently, but when Piper started crying while holding the spear she approached her friend. Her hand clasped around the upper handle of the spear and Piper's eyes traveled up to meet Clarisse's.

"Do you want to learn how to use this?" Clarisse asked her quietly.

Piper reached up and roughly wiped her face off. She pushed her feelings deep into her soul and tried to focus. She gripped the spear with both of her hands and her gaze was steely by the time she looked back at Clarisse.

"Yes."

-x-

Leo hadn't slept. He rarely ate, only to stop the world from spinning. Because if he passed out, then his thoughts would form into dreams and the dreams would be of a certain son of Jupiter that no longer lived in the waking world. And he could not have that.

He could not remember the last time he had social interaction that wasn't with his mechanical dragon or his mind imagining Jason standing beside him. The thought of trying to get over Jason's death, or to pretend that it didn't happen, hurt deep in Leo's core and he refused to move on. Jason deserved better, he thought. Jason deserved to be mulled over and to never be forgotten.

But it was getting exhausting, constantly moving, thinking, and dozing when it all became too much to stay awake. Somewhere he knew Jason was smiling, golden light awash on his features. Or maybe that was just in his dreams.

He turned around to grab another tool, not knowing himself what he was making and only moving to keep busy, and screamed. The tools in his hands clattered to the ground when he failed to catch them.

The only sound was his ragged breathing and he felt like he was looking at a ghost.

"What are you doing here?" he asked harshly. He leaned down to pick up a wrench but lurched back upright when his vision swam. Instead his hand instinctively grasped onto his table. He glared up at her through long, ragged curls. His hair had grown out quite a bit.

"Sit," she said quietly. Against his protests, she lead him over to a chair, shoved everything that was occupying the chair onto the ground, and carefully set him in it. He was too tired to attempt to get up and watched blankly as she scraped over another chair, sitting across from him like a psychiatrist.

Leo stared at her, eyes hollow. He was a shadow of his former self.

"You need to take care of yourself."

"No."

Thalia did not blink. "Jason would want you to take care of yourself. He would not like you to beat yourself up about his death."

Leo didn't react for three long seconds. He felt a boiling rage start up in his core, one that grew larger and larger until it twisted, hot and uncomfortable, right under his ribcage. "How can you talk so callously about your brother? He deserves respect and mourning, and you're forgetting about him! Jason deserves the world and you're giving him the dirt off your shoes!"

A small spark of realization dawned on Thalia's face. "I'm not forgetting about him, Leo. And I'm not saying you should. But tell me, are you respecting Jason Grace's memory right now? Would you look my baby brother in the eye, right now, and be proud of how you're handling things?"

Leo bit his tongue and fell silent. His head bobbed down and his eyes took in his appearance. Dirty, covered in soot and oil, torn clothes that he hadn't changed in days. He probably smelled awful too, and his limbs twitched every other second.

"Mourn for Jason, Leo. But don't forget about yourself in the process."

"How?" Leo whispered. "He's always there. At the edge of my vision. I can't think-"

"Talk to others, Leo. Start to heal." A hand settled on his shoulder. "Sleep."

"I need to make things to keep my mind off of it," Leo said suddenly. "Otherwise I'll go mad. But I don't have anything to make, and I can feel myself slipping."

Thalia considered this. "Once you have slept, showered, eaten, and talked with your friends-who also mourn-make me some new weapons. Ones that can harness electricity without fail."

Leo opened his mouth to say something but she was already gone. He closed his mouth, no words coming out of it. He wondered how she'd found his hiding spot in the first place.

Regardless, as he looked at his person, he felt himself getting more and more disgusted by his actions. Somehow, he dragged himself out of the chair and over to a makeshift bed, collapsing on it and trying, trying, trying to fall asleep. He would shower in the morning, and try to find Piper afterwards.

His dreams were still filled of Jason, but he found himself smiling instead of crying.


End file.
